It's been one of those weeks for me. My Creole wasn't so great, and my teacher let me know it... often and loudly. I tried to be helpful and ended up using precious resources and making a mess. At times, lack of power meant no workout DVD, and a rough case of hives changed my varied diet to just pb and j.
What's a girl to do when one of those weeks comes up? When you feel like everything you do is wrong when you're trying so desperately to do what's right? This morning, the Lord showed me something incredible:
Everything that I do apart from Him fails.
There is nothing good in me on my own.
If anything good comes out of me, it is sheer grace!
If left to myself and my carnal nature, how can anything turn out right? How could it be anything other than failure? But God offers me His righteousness through His Son Jesus Christ. Anything good in me comes from Him. Anything that I do right is a gift from Him. So all that I do must be commited to Him and done out of love for Him. And even if I mess up, He's bigger and greater than my mess and can undo the mischief that I have incurred if He so chooses. Anything good that you see in me is from God.
What a humbling and sweet lesson! And what a load that has taken off my shoulders! That load that pushes me down with guilt when my attempts to do good fail miserably. I'm free from that guilt! My focus can now be on committing all to Him and asking for His grace to do stuff right. According to 2 Cor. 9:8, He is able to make all grace abound to me at all times, so that in all things at all times, I can abound in every good work.
Grace. Sheer grace.
As I was thanking God for His abundant grace that is available to me, He reminded me of something that I had read in Creole this morning. I've been reading the Bible in Creole cuz I think it's fun (i'm weird, i know :o), and I had read of a "ke poze." I love reading the Bible in another language-- it sometimes gives me a new mental picture of a concept. A "ke poze" is a peaceful heart, but the exact words used are "resting heart." The Lord reminded me that as more situations arise today in which I try to do stuff and feel like I'm failing, I can in that moment and every moment have a resting heart. A resting heart is one that asks Jesus for grace and righteousness for the task that is set before it and then rests that He'll provide the grace to accomplish that task or He can fix it afterwards if I mess up. What a relief!!
I've been reading Brother Lawrence's Practicing the Presence of God, and he talks so sweetly of this concept! Here's a little excerpt: